Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Lately...

Lately...
...I haven't changed a diaper all month! For the first time in 8 years, diapers and wipes aren't part of my day! The proverbial, "when they're ready, they're ready" certainly applies here. I learned my lesson with the first 2 kids, trying when they showed interest at 18m and 2 and frustrated when it wasn't until 3 that they "got it". I started to wonder if she'd ever be diaper-free. Alas, she is potty-trained and accident free! More latte money for me.

...I'm pinching myself over how dreamy it is to spend the day with my 3 year old. Should I admit how...dare I say, easy this is? She gets lost in creative play, hardly noticing I've been ticking away at the to-do list. She's content to cuddle up with a stack of books on my lap. She's a gem! This is quite a timely gift!

...I'm learning how to accept what is, what will be, what I cannot change. 

I'm discovering I suck at being helpless and out of control. Especially when it comes to people I care about deeply.

...I never miss a spinning class! Nothing keeps me pushing through high resistance like the blast of "I've got my mind made up and I can't let go...I'll be running til the love runs out"! (Listen to Love Runs Out here: One Republic) I pick a bike in the front for extra accountability not to slack.

...I'm putting eye cream on nightly, sunscreen on the back of my hands, and exfoliating in the shower regularly. 

...My Craigslist search for a Vitamix under $300 is futile. Zulily has reconditioned models for $299 & FS, but it's too risky for me. 

...His books are ultra inspiring! And he's an alumnus of my alma mater, so I'm looking forward to reading, Mark Batterson's latest,  All In.

...This new product seems too good to be true, but every time I've gone to grab it, the colors aren't my fave. Anybody else try it?

...Downton Abbey has been the perfect indulgence after the kids are in bed and Dan is off studying. As with the best novels, I miss the characters now that I'm all caught up. Fingers-crossed January's season will be better than the last one.

...My son will casually mention an obscure story from the Bible he's been reading far too late into the night. The Action Bible is the perfect gift for a comic book loving boy in your life.

...My friends have been thoughtfully reaching out to me during this transition and typically just when I need the boost. Thank you!

...My 5 year-old throws her head back as she slides across our floor, whining "I miss daddy! I wish it was me and daddy."  I'm committed to finding the balance between acknowledging her ache in his absence and encouraging her to focus on the joy to be had even without him. It's enlightening to see yourself in your children, isn't it?

...I nearly declined the chance for a night out with my husband because my hair and makeup weren't done. Free childcare because my dad was visiting and a night out with my favorite person, and I almost refused because I didn't like how I looked! Someone slap me. Thankfully, I came to my senses.

...I'm praying for the grace to live this way:
"Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. 
Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.  
Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other...
Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying...
Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep."
Romans 12:9,12,14 &15









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Thursday, September 4, 2014

Welcome back, school!

While I'm rejecting pumpkins & colored leaves suggesting Summer give way to Fall, I could go around hugging the school staff for opening the doors to my kids this week. If you come over, I can perform the back-to-school jingle & choreography that sprang up spontaneously on the first morning as I plunked ice packs into lunches. We are ready!
Their clean sneakers and pressed pants and combed hair reflect the fresh start and lofty ambitions of this new year. My 5 year old is ready for Kindergarten; her maturity matches her zeal this time around. It was more emotional to walk my son into his 3rd grade classroom. Next year is his last in Elementary school. How can that be? 
Just when their absence starts feeling strange, I'm thankful for smiling faces bounding toward me from the school bus at the end of the day.

The peppy girl in the previous post crawled her way to this week. It felt like the end of my first 10K: adrenaline drained and my playlist lost it's power, but quitting wasn't an option. I crossed the finish line but not in any picturesque form.
It turns out there's no easing into MD school. For the first few weeks, I barely saw my husband. He is out of bed before me and in bed after me. He's studying or in class for all but a couple of hours he's committed to eating dinner together & putting the kids to bed. He says it's like drinking from a fire hose. He loves it! I'm genuinely happy for him. But that doesn't make adjusting much easier. And neither does reading the schedule and hearing testimonials from previous students as to the rigor of the program. Living it out ourselves is so much different. We had a number of spirit-crushing moments.
We're compiling quite the list things to be grateful for as well.
He passed his first exam and we celebrated with a couple of days together, taking deep breaths and exchanging knowing glances.
We're going to make it through.
We signed up for this dang race-we're going to pace ourselves, find our stride around each bend, capitalize on surges of adrenaline, and enjoy as much of it as possible.

I'm praying & believing these words for my children. I'm trusting them, myself.

The Lord is faithful;
He will strengthen you
and guard you from the Evil One...
May the Lord lead your hearts into 
a full understanding and expression of the love of God
and the patient endurance that comes from Christ...
May the Lord of peace himself
give you his peace at all times
in every situation.
2 Thess. 3: 3, 5, 16



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