Monday, July 28, 2008

what can I say? sometimes you just don't have control over your child's cooperation...born or unborn.
today was a big day for me. i had been looking forward to the ultrasound this morning for many weeks. the last time we were there the technician cheerfully told me that i'd love this one. b/c of how late i am in my pregnancy, they can see & send me home with pictures of the baby that are nearly glimpses of her at birth. i hadn't had one this late in pregnancy with carter, so this was going to be an exciting first.
we got up pretty close to last minute (let's just say nobody is sleeping well in our house these days) so there was no time for me to grab breakfast (which may or may not have affected the outcome of the ultrasound). i did have a bit of coffee & some water before it began.
the techs are really relatable & knowledgeable at this office. she was really patient in trying to get a good glimpse & even stepped out for a while to give the baby some time to move, but to no avail. she had her head face down & legs tucked closely together up under her belly the whole time we were looking at her. she just didn't want to cooperate.
thankfully, i'm not blogging with disappointment in some health risk that was detected. all of her essential parts were visible enough for examination & checked out perfectly normal.
her face, however, will remain a mystery for the next 7 weeks.

much more distressing to me is how abnormally uncooperative carter has been for over a week now with napping. he's not sick, not scared, not hungry or wet, not lacking for physical activity to tire him out prior; he's just plain refusing to nap. to make it worse, he's pulling all kinds of stunts behind his closed bedroom door. doing so quietly enough that i think he is sleeping until a crash or toy starts sounding from in there. he has pulled all of the clothes from his drawers, strewn wipes all across the floor, pulled decorations down from the wall, you name it...it's going on in there. i'm at my end with what to do to discipline him for his disobedience. nothing's working. AGH!

isn't it supposed to be that all will be well with carter, having 2 devoted parents, committed to balance between structure & play, providing good nutrition, personal attention & appropriate discipline for the crime at hand. i'm ready to just throw it all to the wind & let him watch as much disney as he desires, eat junk food instead of sliced apples or carrots, and throw toys his way while i do something i enjoy rather than spending time on the floor building block towers or creating the day's craft. why am i doing all of this work, if the outcome isn't rewarding? this isn't how it's supposed to work!

well i better go. i'm hearing silence for the longest stretch this afternoon so either he's repainting the walls or he's sleeping so angelically i'll forget i wanted to strap him to his bed a few minutes ago! Pin It

Saturday, July 19, 2008

"mommy, flashlight not working".

"sorry, carter i don't have batteries."

"batteries...uh...walmart." nods his head to confirm that this is the right thing to do


"mommy, HakunaMata movie?"

"we don't have that movie, carter. it's at grammie's house in NY. remember?"

"uh...yea...target?" nods his head in confirmation, or as a suggestion of what i should do next!


"where..going..mommy?"

"sams club"

"uh..sams cub..uh...pizza?" pleased, he nods his head.


at 2, he knows this city according to mommy's errands & stops. others can vouch for the fact that he knows which intersection leads to which location. getting off the loop @Slide & turning left...Chik fil A. going down University under the loop, he says "hi mc donalds" as he looks out to the right and when we make the turn left under the loop, he starts talking about "Dee's class" & his friend Lauryn, two people that he assumes live at the church. turning @82nd street, "gym. kids".

the very first time this association showed up was with Starbucks. he saw the sign & said "mommy's juice" which has become "mommy coffee, Carter water".

this is not a new development, but it does keep progressing. when he started calling out his friends names based on the section of town we were in (& was right about them living there) and telling me which store would have certain things that he was craving, i had to share! it's one of my favorite things thus far about life with Carter. his little personality is worth all that colic we endured when he was a baby & clearly not enjoying his limitations.
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Monday, July 14, 2008

The lies that bind us

Loved this particular day in my No Other gods study...meant to blog about it & now that it's still not stopped taking it's turn at the forefront of my mind, I've got to share it with you.

I thought immediately of my dear friends following the call of God on their lives to the Jewish people in Queens. Boy has the Devil tried to get in their way, and I'm recalling specifically in the housing dept. Time after another they've been basically kicked to the curb by yet another landlord or superior. Once, just before their 2nd child was expected to arrive into the world! Again, they need your prayers for God's divine provision for new housing; perhaps, a house of their own, that may not be taken from them as the rentals have. This day in Chronicles, made me think first of them.

2 Chronicles 32:1-23
WAIT!! Back up... 31:20 "This is what Hezekiah did throughout Judah, doing what was good & right & faithful before the Lord his God. In EVERYTHING that he undertook in the service of God's temple & in obedience to the law & commands, he sought his God & worked wholeheartedly. And so he prospered." (emphasis mine. b/c come on, that's a lesson in itself! but not today's!)

32:1-23:
With Hezekiah's faithful works, Sennacherib, king of Assyria, invaded Judah. Hezekiah consults with his officials & gets their help with inhibiting Sennacherib. He encourages his military, 7 "'Be strong & courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged because of the king of Assyria & the vast army with him, for there is a greater power with us than with him. With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the Lord our God to help us fight our battles.' And the people gained confidence..."
Then Sennacherib sends this message to Hezekiah & the people of Judah:
10. "...On what are you basing your confidence, that you remain in Jerusalem under seige?" (SECOND GUESSING)

11."When Hezekiah says 'The Lord our God will save us...he is misleading you....Do you not know what I & my predecessors have done to all the peoples of the other lands?" (INTIMIDATION)
13 &14. "Were the gods of those nations ever able to deliver their land from my hand? Who of all the gods of these nations...has been able to save his people from me? How then can your god deliver you from my hand?" (IS YOUR GOD SO POWERFUL?) (DOES HE REALLY PROMISE TO SAVE YOU? GO BEFORE YOU? BE WITH YOU?)

Sennacherib's officers went further, writing letters ridiculing the Lord & casting doubt on His power to save. Hezekiah & Isaiah cried out to the Lord and in the end, "21 God sent an angel, who annihilated all the fighting men & the commanders & officers in the camp of the Assyrian king. So we withdrew to his own land in disgrace. And...some of his sons cut him down with the sword."

22 "So the Lord saved Hezekiah & the people of Jerusalem...He took care of them on every side."

I will not let the lies of my Enemy bind me from moving forward, from staying the course, from following the Word that I know God has spoken into my heart. This is my vow. Rehearse the truth; write it on a card & place it on your fridge or your dashboard or your monitor. Don't let the Enemy steal or taint it. Don't let the power of the truth fade & get clouded by life's circumstances.

Carter's nap has ended & I have no time to edit! Sorry... Pin It

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Cutefest 2008!





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Monday, July 7, 2008

Ok, fessing time. I'm 10 weeks from delivery (technically from Wed). And I've been very blessed with a scare-free, still-able-to-maintain-normal-activity pregnancy. If you've asked me how I'm feeling now that I'm further along, I've told you, what is predominantly true, "I feel great!" Can't complain. Still up & at 'em, as I like it. I tell my OB & nurses the same thing.

There is one small thing that I've omitted. But that pesky small thing has slowly taken over heart & home as I've had little to no relief from it at all. I'm not sleeping. I have this strange hatred toward nightfall, as I want nothing more than to crawl into bed & curl up with my pillows & husband & sleep until dawn. Some days I wish to start this routine earlier than 9pm, and could, but I resist, for I know the struggle involved.

Some of you may remember this from my pregnancy with Carter. You know how there are numerous & various symptoms of pregnancy. It's fascinating to hear each different experience, as it varies from the next. But experiencing this "who would have thought" symptom isn't so welcome. Here's my problem: my arms get that fall asleep feeling, that turns quickly to nerve pain & keeps me from sleeping. Keeps me from falling asleep, which I've been remedying with Tylenol PM. But wakes me up, once the meds wear off. The anatomical reasons for it are sort of involved, but basically letting my shoulders relax, (by reclining) creates this chain reaction that results in this painful problem.

The first few weeks were really hard. Especially because Carter was also waking up in the middle of the night, trying to get back into our routine after vacation & then we had thunder storms. My Cuisinart was set & timed to brew my much needed coffee as soon as I woke up. That worked for a while. Then the coffee became no match for my exhaustion. I tried to sleep when Carter napped, but to no avail. Because as I said before, the reclining (yes, I've even tried the recliner & sofa instead of bed) brings on the parastesia (sp?) and pain.

Here I am over a month of just about 2-4 hours of broken up sleep a night, and I've contracted some kind of cold that I just can't shake. My arm & hand is "asleep" even as I type this & the pain is settling in. Just about anything I use my hand for results in this. Similar to carpal tunnel pain. It's a small, annoying constant that is here until I give birth, if it's going to work like it did with Carter. It's not welcome. I'm having a hard time just getting used to it. And it's really getting me down. The pain, the sleeplessness, the loss of control it's not fun.

I know, I know, my humanity is showing. Now it's just out there for you to see. In case I've tried to prove to you otherwise, I am mortal. There it is.

I spent Sat & Sun in bed because all of this had caught up to me & I needed to take advantage of Dan being at home & willing to hang with Carter. I slept here & there. The cold was really what got me off my feet. The Tylenol cold, multi-symptom something or other that Dan got for me provided some great relief while it lasted & I kept popping! (PS: all Tylenol meds were approved by my OB.)

I had to miss singing at church on Sunday morning. Which I just hate missing. But really, I couldn't sing. Sunday marked the anniversary of our first date & first meeting face to face. We usually do something to commemorate. This year, I'd planned for our sitter to come & for Dan & I to head out for dinner & a movie.

It was a great surprise for Dan. Though, he was sitting on the bed beside me thinking "you don't look like a person that can go out tonight". And said something to that degree at one point. We set it up that he took Carter out of the house & wore him out until naptime. This would give me a quiet house to rest (perhaps the best gift of all!) Then he went on a bike ride for a couple of hours while Carter slept. (This made me feel better for having emptied all parenting duties onto him for the day).

I took a shower & got prettied up. Took some good meds & put a smile on my face. Jenna came & Carter couldn't have been more happy to see us go. He just loves her! We drove down our street & Dan looked at me & sort of got "stuck" looking a bit longer & said "you're really pretty." Tell you anything about how dreadful I looked for the past 2 days in bed! Anyway, we had a really nice conversation at dinner & enjoyed each others company the whole night.

That's the power of drugs....love, I meant. Pin It

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Smash hit!

We had a great fourth of July. Really felt like a family this year. Complete with new traditions & great memories. Like he hasn't in far, far too long, Carter slept in until 9:15am! Which meant that we didn't trek down to the parade bright & early as planned. But, for that late start, GOD BLESS AMERICA! Feeling patriotic (and possibly overjoyed with the extra couple hours of sleep!) Dan made red, white, and blue waffles; strawberries, blueberries, and whipped cream. Carter was sous chef.
After a leisurely morning, we headed over to the street fair. He got his face painted & danced to the music. Waited in line in the hot, hot sun for yummy roasted corn & hot dogs.

The highlight was our fireworks experience. He ran around & took up with a family whose blanket was set up near ours. They got a real charge out of how independently he walked around & the young girls chased him all over the grass. He played catch with another family behind us, and enjoyed the ice cream treat he got with Daddy.

The fireworks didn't begin until after 10:30. But were well worth the wait. Carter was shouting out the names of the colors that flashed across the sky. The perfect day! Hope yours was just as memorable. Happy 4th of July!
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